A few days ago, my sister, Liz, lost one of the greatest loves of her life: her cherished Golden Retriever, Jessie. Liz is heartbroken, beside herself with grief. I know how she feels; in fact, many of us know her anguish. The pain which permeates every cell of your body. When my dog, Chester, died a few years ago, the agony took my breath away; a feeling which I thought would last forever.
So, I’ve been wondering, how can these animals take up such a huge part of our hearts? How can this loss break us open and cause us to bleed, even if the grief is only in our minds?
Often it is said that it is the unconditional love they give us. To me, it is certainly that, but it is so much more.
“You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘Wow, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!’” – Dave Barry
Our dogs simply adore us. Whether we are right or wrong, crabby or happy, rich or poor. They seem to honestly believe we walk on water, that we are charming, brilliant, and oh-so-smart.
“Such short little lives our pets have to spend with us, and they spend most of it waiting for us to come home each day.” – John Grogan
And because our dogs simply adore us, the best part of their day is when we walk in the door. No other person does that for us so consistently. Seeing us arrive at the door is like Christmas morning to them.
“Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.” – Emily Dickinson
Admit it, your dog has heard everything. We’ve all shared our deepest darkest secrets with our dogs, and again, because we can do no wrong in their eyes, they do not judge us. And, even better, they do not tell.
“When an eighty-five pound mammal licks your tears away, then tries to sit on your lap, it’s hard to feel sad.” – Kristan Higgins
Not much I can add to that wisdom. We all know it’s true.
“Sometimes losing a pet is more painful than losing a human because in the case of the pet, you were not pretending to love it.” – Amy Sedaris
Not only do dogs love us unconditionally, we love them unconditionally. Can you imagine being in a long-standing argument with your dog? Dreading spending the holiday with a dog? You may get angry (as I do) when they pee on the carpet or chew your shoe, but all is quickly forgiven when they look at you with tucked tail and remorseful eyes. Or again, when they wag their tail furiously because they are so happy to see you.
“If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them.” – Phil Pastoret
Dogs depend on us. To keep them fed, to walk them, to praise them, and yes, to give them the correct number of treats. That sense of responsibility feels good. And, unlike sullen teenagers, dogs are so appreciative of our efforts.
“Not the least hard thing to bear when they go from us, these quiet friends, is that they carry away with them so many years of our own lives.” – John Galsworthy
Our dogs are with us through divorce, death of a loved one, and depression, just as they are with us through all the happy times. Our memories are always infused with our dogs, jumping around in excitement, or sitting with us as we cry.
Not only are dogs with us through the highs and lows, they are with us through the ordinary. Any place, any routine, can bring up unbearable pain as we remember our dogs being right there by our side.
“The one best place to bury a good dog is in the heart of his master.” – Ben Hur Lampman
And so, we say goodbye to Jessie, just as my friend Suzie said goodbye to Scout earlier this week, and I had to say goodbye to Chester. These dogs remain forever in our hearts.
“Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Roger Cara